'We were the only Muslim family in town': How Abeer embraced life in the outback

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Abeer Fathi (R) meets up with her new friend, Nora Jones (L), every Tuesday. Credit: Supplied by Abeer Fatthy

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When Abeer Fathi's husband, Abubakr Ali, accepted a position as a doctor in Bourke, 800km northwest of Sydney, she said she didn't hesitate to join him.


Key Points
  • The Fathi family has lived in both Bourke and Tenterfield, NSW.
  • Abeer Fathi urges other migrants to throw themselves into their new communities.
  • The family has embraced country living, she says.
When Abeer Fathi's husband, Abubakr Ali, an emergency room doctor, was offered a job in a regional area in 2018, she said she didn't hesitate to go with him.

“I had the option to stay in Sydney with my kids, but I chose to go with him,” she said.

“I wanted to see the whole of Australia.

“Big cities are similar all over the world. I wanted to experience the lifestyle in regional areas.”

Despite some anxiety, she said she packed her bags and moved with the couple's three children Haroun,10, Moussa, 8, and Mariam, 7.

“In Bourke at that time, we were the only Muslim family,” she said.

“Everyone was welcoming to us and the town council organised a party for newcomers, who were basically us.”

Before immigrating to Australia, Ms Fathi worked as a migration and education agent in Cairo, Egypt. She said as part of her job, she had made a few business trips, during which Australia left an impression on her.

"I visited different countries in Europe, and I had a US green card, but I preferred Australia," she explained.

"Australia felt familiar and I loved how friendly people were."

Christchurch massacre

Ms Fathi said the town's reaction following the March 2019 Christchurch mosque shootings had been reassuring.

“The police knocked on my door and told me I was safe and they were there for me,” Ms Fathi said.

“They gave me their mobile phone numbers and asked me to call them if I faced any discrimination or if I was afraid to go out on my own.”
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Nora Jones (R) was one of the first friends Ms Fathi made in Tenterfield. Credit: Supplied by Abeer Fatthy
She said the gesture of support had encouraged her to be more social and interact more with the community.
I joined the Rotary Club and volunteered for the local council using my engineering background to help as much as possible.
Abeer Fathi
A number of people told Ms Fathi they did not expect her to be a community contributor.

"People were a little surprised to see a Muslim woman so active in the community. (I was told) There were expectations that I would stay home.”

Next stop Tenterfield

When it was time for the family to leave Bourke, the townspeople said goodbye to them with a lot of love, according to Ms Fathi.
“They had a big farewell party for us and it was attended by everyone, including the school principal and the mayor,” she said.

“At least 50 families attended.”

The family of five moved to Tenterfield in NSW, 276km south of Brisbane, in 2021, and were again the only Muslim family in town.

“My 65-year-old neighbour and my other 92-year-old neighbour (Nora Jones) had never met a Muslim in their lives,” Ms Fathi said.
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Abeer Fatthy with her friends, Jenna and Andrea, in Tenterfield Credit: Supplied by Abeer Fatthy

New friends

Nora Jones, 92, has lived her whole life in regional NSW and said Ms Fathi was the first Muslim person she had ever met.

Ms Fathi said one of the first questions Ms Jones had asked her was why she wore the hijab.

“I explained to her the religious importance of the hijab for some Muslim women, and since then she has shown a lot of respect,” she said.
“Now, when she knocks on my door with her son, she tells him to wait outside until (while I put on) my hijab."

Ms Fathi and Ms Jones have a regular meet-up each week.

“Tuesday is our day every week. We go out for breakfast and then go to the movies,” Ms Fathi said.

She adds, “We have a lot in common, from motherhood to the latest news in town.”

Being only Muslims is 'not a challenge'

Ms Fathi said she didn't regard being the only Muslim woman in town as a challenge.

“It's just a difference, and there's a lot of common ground we can build on,” she said.

Ms Fathi, who said she enjoyed a rural lifestyle, has built strong ties with her neighbours.

“We're more like a family now,” she explained.
If I find a snake in my back yard or if I want someone to pick up my kids from school, I call one of my neighbours and ask for help. That was not the case in Sydney.
Abeer Fathi

Find common ground

Ms Fathi said it was up to each individual to try to get involved in their communities and make new friends across cultures.

“It's up to us to find those commonalities,” she said.

Her own experience with life in regional areas had taught her many valuable lessons, she said.
“It's a person's decision to (either) isolate themselves and feel different or to become involved in the community,” she said.

“I didn't want my kids to grow up in a closed community. I wanted them to engage with people of all backgrounds and be part of the larger community.”

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